Who are you being…Is it who you want to be?
I recently attended a retreat called Soulful Mastery in the New Forest, led by coaches Claire Norman and Anna Springett. While my initial motivation for signing up was the restorative aspects, I also gained invaluable leadership insights.
One of the most powerful exercises happened during a more art-focussed session. After wandering through nature, taking in the sights, sounds, and smells, we each chose a natural object. We then drew it. However, there was a twist - we had to remain completely focused on the item itself without looking at the paper. To help us out, we couldn’t see the paper as our pens had a cardboard cover – like an umbrella. My chosen subject was a leaf. I liked it because it was just starting to show the signs of Autumn with it’s normal green starting to dapple into reds.
Now, I'm no Picasso, but I have to say that I was amazed at how accurately I captured the details of the leaf. Once I redirected my attention from self-critique to the subject in hand, my drawing really captured its essence. What an “aha" moment. It taught me two key leadership lessons:
Let go of overthinking.
It’s easy to overanalyse our actions, paralysed by perfectionism. Yet our best work often flows freely when we quiet the inner critic and get out of our own way. Rather than obsessing over the how, trust your abilities and focus on the what. Progress lies in presence, not perception.
Anchor in others
Real progress and understanding come when we anchor our focus on the person or task at hand, not ourselves. Open and compassionate curiosity provides insights that our narrow self-focussed lens might overlook.
While these are deceptively simple concepts, they can be easily obscured by busy schedules and multiple demands. In our hurry, we multitask rather than focus. We efficiently complete tasks, but we don’t necessarily perform them with artistry or elegance. We may multitask (or multi-fail??) through meetings or interactions rather than being fully present. The exercise made me realise that progress and mastery require mindset shifts rather than sheer effort.
Being vs. Doing
The journey from senior practitioner to master is less about accumulating skills or techniques and more about presence. It’s about who we are being in each moment. Are we approaching situations with curiosity, empathy and authenticity, or are we fixated on the outcomes that we want to achieve? How we are showing up matters more than how capable at execution we are.
The Soulful Mastery Retreat was a gift to myself – an opportunity for self-care, reflection, and connecting with an inspiring community of fellow coaches. Set against the natural beauty of the New Forest, the retreat provided the perfect setting to restore my spirit. I returned feeling mentally clear, emotionally centred, and eager to bring my insights into being a more present, compassionate coach and leader.
Finding Meaning in Being
As leaders, it is easy to get caught up in day-to-day challenges, tasks, deadlines and objectives. This can drown out our ability to examine who we are becoming amidst the doing. It's about rejecting being a busy fool, fixated only on getting things done, and instead finding meaning in the intentional, focused way that we approach each person or task. The retreat gave me the opportunity to ask myself not just what I want to accomplish but, more importantly, who I want to become in the process.
Who are you being?
So, I have a challenge for you as a leader: Take a moment for self-reflection. Pause and ask yourself:
Who am I being?
Who do I want to be?
How well is who I am being aligned with who I want to be?
Your answers might reveal new opportunities for personal and professional growth.
If you’d like to explore these opportunities further, book in for a free 30-minute consultation with me. I’d love to hear about your discoveries and chart a course for your continued growth.
